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When our "presence" as ministers is more important than our words
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Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  doyle: When our "presence" as ministers is more important than our words
A few days ago, a patient at our hospital in South Atlanta, was only minutes from death. The Director of Critical Care called and asked me to make a visit. The patient's wife, I'll call her Donna, was on her way to the hospital. Staff had called to tell her that her husband had taken a “turn for the worst.” The Critical Care Director and I met her when she arrived. Several of the nurses were busily adjusting the many machines stacked up to help keep her husband alive. The patient's wife went to the far side of the bed and stood there quietly weeping. As the nurses finished and left the room, I went to stand near her. “My name is Doyle. I'm one of the Chaplains. May I stay with youawhile?” I asked. She nodded yes.Previously, I would have been thinking of something soothing to say; words of hope and help, possibly a Scripture verse. However, we have been receiving Chaplain's in-service training about how important our non-anxious presence is when a patient or their family members are experiencing chaos in their life. There certainly is a time for soothing words and Scripture, but the in-serve about the importance of establishing a presence with a patient, is broadening my effectiveness. In this case, I just stood by her side for several minutes. I'm a talker and almost always have a word of hope or Scripture for a patient, so this presence thing is somewhat difficult for me. I did radio for years and dead airspace was forbidden.Without me doing or saying anything, in a short time, Donna leaned against me for emotional support. At the time, having me present” was of more help to her than words would have been. Obviously, we don't want to weird people out by standing around like a bunch of zombies, but wisdom helps us know when to talk and when to just be present.Most of my time is spent in the ER and any presence that is established with a patient, has to be done rather quickly. Plus, most of them are in pain. Just standing there will work for a few but most need some calming words or prayer.Several days later, I saw Donna in the cafeteria. “Chaplain,” she exclaimed. “My husband is doing much better. Thank you for all you did to help me the other day.” The only thing I had done was to be present there with her. I shared it was good news to learn that her husband had improved. Later, a familiar and inspiring Scripture became more alive to me with an expanded understanding:Psalm 46:1:“God is our refuge and strength, a
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  Old Time Country Preacher:
Good Advice OTCP
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  doyle:
Clinical Pastoral Education, CPE, has not improved my love for the Lord. That's not it's purpose. The purpose is to train people to be more effective in ministering to hurting people. It continues to expand my abilities in being with those who are desperately hurting and dying. The death rate has been 100 percent since early in the Old Testament (Only two have not died - Elijah and Enoch), it only makes sense for we ministers to have specialized training to be of comfort to the one passing from this life and their family during their hour of crisis. For most families, it is a frightful experience.Learning to be a non-anxious presence in their time of chaos, can be of incredible help to them. Absolutely, I agree with you OTCP that every COG minister, and especially those who are seeking ordination, should be required to take at least one unit of CPE. It is training I wish I had 30 years ago. However, it would be important to receive CPE from a more conservative teacher instead of a liberal instructor. In most cases, the Chaplain at your local hospital will know where CPE can be taken.Doyl
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  JLarry: Re: Good Advice OTCP
A few years ago a local a local hospices company was looking for a chaplain. I applied for the job and possibly have gotten the job. But I did not have a CPE. After reading this thread I have a desire to obtain a CPE.How long did it take for some of you to get a CPE Recorded Sermons @ www.pastorwiley.com
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  wayne: agreed
This last week I dealt with the death of a lady connected to our church, she had died of cancer. She was a believer so, that was easy to handle but then the husband to this woman decided to commit suicide because he could not live without her. This couple was in their late 40's to early 50's and the sad thing was they left behind a 20 something year old daughter. I was called out to be with this family and to be honest, I didn't know what to say so, I didn't say a whole lot. I prayed with them, hugged her, gave the husband to signs to look for(if she is starting to get depressed) and just let her talk and cry. I truly don't know what to say in these situations. I just got a thought, I have a COG Pastor in our area who is a lead chaplain at one of our local hospitals. I will see if he can provide some training to our ministers.
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  JLarry:
Wayne your presence spoke to them. You are an Ambassador, that is what they needed.No one can teach you what to say, when nothing said will help. They needed support. They needed a man of God and you were that man Recorded Sermons @ www.pastorwiley.com
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  Da Sheik:
..
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  wayne:
Thank you Larry - I appreciate the encouragement.
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  Lloyd Looney: Presence
It was hard for me to learn to tolerate the pain and anxiety that others feel when I was learning and growing through my CPE experience. The crisis experiences that the hospital patients were going through often made me realize I was in need of healing as much as the persons in the crisis. It made the idea of Immanuel (God with us) take on a new meaning as I began to try and have an incarnational ministry where I learned to be with people. It also changed/expanded my theology of healing and gave me a much broader, and deeper, perspective of how God heals.Doyle, if you are changing in how you do ministry and are embodying Christ, you may have to change your motto about 2/3 of God being go to something else
Author:  acts [ Tue Jan 14, 2025 2:07 am ]
Post subject:  Da Sheik:
I often think of this verse from Proverbs:Proverbs 25:20
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