| In the book “Let Your Life Speak,” author Parker J. Palmer, a dedicated Quaker, talks bluntly about his frustration in finding what he wanted to do in life. He had tried several things, but said he did not “feel at home” in any of them. He said, “If you buy the scurrilous notion that 'those who can, do, and those who can't, teach' (which I may have half-believed at the time, mired as I was in a slough-of-despond), you will understand why it felt like I had exhausted all possible vocations!”“If I was ever to discover a new direction,” he reasoned, “It would be at Pendle Hill, a (Quaker) community rooted in prayer, study, and a vision of human possibility. But when I arrived and started sharing my vocational quandary, people responded with a traditional Quaker counsel that, despite their good intentions, left me even more discouraged. Have faith, they said, and 'way' will open. I have faith, he thought, but What I don't have is time to wait for 'way' to open. I'm approaching middle age at warp speed, and I have yet to find a vocational path that feels right. After a few months of deepening frustration, I took my troubles to an older Quaker woman well known for her thoughtfulness and candor. Ruth, I said, People keep telling me that `way' will open. Well, I sit in the silence, I pray, I listen for my calling, but way is not opening. I've been trying to find my vocation for a long time, and I still don't have the foggiest idea of what I'm meant to do. Way may open for other people, but it's sure not opening for me. Ruth's reply was a model of Quaker plain-speaking. I'm a birthright Friend (A Quaker since birth), she said somberly, And in sixty-plus years of living, 'way' has never opened in front of me. She paused, and I started sinking into despair. Was this wise woman telling me that the Quaker concept of God's guidance was a hoax? Then she spoke again, this time with a grin. But a lot of 'way' has closed behind me, and that's had the same guiding effect.Palmer Parker says, “I laughed with her, laughed loud and long, the kind of laughter that comes when a simple truth exposes your heart for the needlessly neurotic mess it has become. Ruth's honesty gave me a new way to look at my vocational journey, and my experience has long since confirmed the lesson she taught me that day: there is as much guidance in what does not, and cannot not happen in my life, as there is in what can and does, maybe more. |